Leave the American Hamster Wheel

Smart, darkly funny guides for burned-out professionals, early retirees, and anyone Googling 'how to leave the U.S.' at 2 a.m.

Join The Departure Lane

Your boarding pass to every plan, checklist, and no-BS story about moving abroad.

Get free instant access to:
Get the tools now—ghost it later if you want. (No hard feelings.)

Regular emails with survival tips and unfiltered stories                  

The Exit Strategy Toolkit (checklists, budget planner, 90-day plan)

Early access to bundles, books, and behind-the-scenes updates   

Visa Checklists

Ongoing Expat Tips + Launch Alerts

90-Day Exit Planner

Budget + "Oh Sh*t" Fund Templates

Emotional Prep & Mindset Tools

Why The Departure Lane Exists

It didn’t start as a business—it started as a question: “What the hell am I doing?” Exit Strategies was born in a messy apartment, built through trial, error, and far too many visa tabs open at once. I couldn’t find one place that offered both the practical tools and the emotional support needed to move abroad—so I created it. The Departure Lane is what I wish I’d had. It’s a toolkit, yes—but more than that, it’s a path forward. One click, one checklist, one story at a time.

Escape Isn’t One-Size-Fits-All

Choose the Exit Book that fits

Ciao, Savings Account

How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Italian Inefficiency.

The Permesso Chronicles

Living La Dolce Vita One Bureaucratic Disaster at a Time

The Digital Nomad’s Chronicles – Mexico

How Moving to Mexico Forced Me to Unlearn Everything I Thought I Knew

Ciao Companion Workbook

Visa checklists, budget breakdowns, emotional “what the hell am I doing?” trackers—this workbook turns your expat wine dream into a structured plan.

Digital Nomad Italy Workbook

You’ve got Zoom calls, deadlines, and a fantasy of working from Florence. This workbook is how you pull it off without rage-quitting your career or crying at the TIM store.

Gringo Nomad Workbook

What do you get when you mix a budget, a visa process, and culture shock?

The Ultimate Exit Bundle

Everything you need in one hit

Italy Exit Kit – For Passive Income Earners

Ciao, cubicle. This bundle gives you the full system to leave the U.S., move to Italy, and avoid the usual disasters—financial, emotional, and gastronomical.

Italy Exit Kit – For Digital Nomads

You want to work from Italy without losing your income (or your mind). This bundle is your plan

Mexico Move Bundle – Gringo Starter Kit

Think of this as your cultural crash course + printable panic guide.

The Ultimate Exit Blueprint

The full Exit Strategies system in one mega-bundle.
All three guidebooks, all three workbooks, and the toolkit to help you leave with clarity, courage, and just enough sarcasm to survive.

Still Deciding?

Totally fair. Moving to another country is a weird mix of excitement, anxiety, and Googling things like “can I bring my dog to Portugal.”

If you’re exit-curious but not quite ready to commit:

Download the Toolkit

it's free, and it doesn’t care if you ghost it later

Preview the Books

short, darkly funny, and brutally honest

Browse the Bundles

see what fits your chaos level